It’s weird. I simply sit at a low limit online table. I buy in for a hefty amount because I don’t like being short and I don’t like rebuying and I like to look like a big man. I sit quietly and play.
At least once, often several times, in a session the chat will go from silence to an explosion of hatred in my direction. It used to bother me and eat at me. Somewhere along the way, my feelings have changed from anger to amusement when the comments fly in my direction. Now I actually watch the chat box eagerly waiting after wacky hands. I have decided to start recording it, because just talking about it just doesn’t quite share how strange and fascinating it really is.
I wish I had started long ago, but I’ll open with one that started yesterday. You must keep in mind that I don’t generally talk much at a table unless someone else opens up the “conversation”. Also, when I’m responding I’m generally trying to just be amusing and/or else trying to propagate the idea that I am a stone cold idiot monkey. Here we go.
PokerStars Game #11175877111: Hold’em Limit ($2/$4) – 2007/07/28 – 04:17:32 (ET)
Table ‘Ariel II’ 10-max Seat #9 is the button
Seat 2: 1EarWilly ($99 in chips)
Seat 3: merry ($71 in chips)
Seat 4: Maccent ($63 in chips)
Seat 5: kickabuck68 ($149 in chips)
Seat 7: Kept Mann ($64.50 in chips)
Seat 8: Bottmfeeder ($75 in chips)
Seat 9: GutshotJimmy ($391.50 in chips)
Seat 10: Ertel’s_girl ($89 in chips)
Ertel’s_girl: posts small blind $1
1EarWilly: posts big blind $2*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to GutshotJimmy [Qc Qs]
merry: folds
Maccent: raises $2 to $4
kickabuck68: folds
Kept Mann: folds
Bottmfeeder: folds
GutshotJimmy: raises $2 to $6
Ertel’s_girl: folds
1EarWilly: folds
Maccent: calls $2
*** FLOP *** [Td 9c 2s]
Maccent: checks
GutshotJimmy: bets $2
Maccent: raises $2 to $4
GutshotJimmy: raises $2 to $6
Maccent: raises $2 to $8
Betting is capped
GutshotJimmy: calls $2
*** TURN *** [Td 9c 2s] [Jd]
Maccent: bets $4
GutshotJimmy: raises $4 to $8
Maccent: raises $4 to $12
GutshotJimmy: raises $4 to $16
Betting is capped
Maccent: calls $4
*** RIVER *** [Td 9c 2s Jd] [As]
Maccent: checks
GutshotJimmy: bets $4
Maccent: calls $4
*** SHOW DOWN ***
GutshotJimmy: shows [Qc Qs] (a pair of Queens)
Maccent: mucks hand
GutshotJimmy collected $69 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $71 | Rake $2
Board [Td 9c 2s Jd As]
Seat 4: Maccent mucked [Ts Qh]
Seat 9: GutshotJimmy (button) showed [Qc Qs] and won ($69) with a pair of Queens
Maccent said, “**** you dude”GutshotJimmy said, “don’t hate the playah”
1EarWilly said, “thats right jimmy”
Maccent said, “GET THE **** OUTTA HERE”
** Note: I almost never 4-bet the turn there, but once in a while after seeing someone play a while you just go with your instincts, and something was definitely fishy with this guy.
PokerStars Game #11175933667: Hold’em Limit ($2/$4) – 2007/07/28 – 04:25:54 (ET)
Table ‘Ariel II’ 10-max Seat #1 is the button
Seat 1: Rampage ($71 in chips)
Seat 2: 1EarWilly ($98 in chips)
Seat 4: Maccent ($105 in chips)
Seat 5: kickabuck68 ($146 in chips)
Seat 6: CircusSeal ($30 in chips)
Seat 7: Kept Mann ($51.50 in chips)
Seat 8: Bottmfeeder ($51 in chips)
Seat 9: GutshotJimmy ($424.50 in chips)
Seat 10: Ertel’s_girl ($77 in chips)
1EarWilly: posts small blind $1
Maccent: posts big blind $2
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to GutshotJimmy [Ks 9c]
kickabuck68: folds
CircusSeal: folds
Kept Mann: folds
Bottmfeeder: calls $2
GutshotJimmy: raises $2 to $4
Ertel’s_girl: folds
Rampage: folds
1EarWilly: folds
Maccent: raises $2 to $6
Bottmfeeder: folds
GutshotJimmy: calls $2
*** FLOP *** [8d 7h 5d]
Maccent: checks
GutshotJimmy: bets $2
Maccent: calls $2
*** TURN *** [8d 7h 5d] [4c]
Maccent: checks
GutshotJimmy: checks
*** RIVER *** [8d 7h 5d 4c] [9h]
Maccent: checks
GutshotJimmy: bets $4
Maccent: calls $4
*** SHOW DOWN ***
GutshotJimmy: shows [Ks 9c] (a pair of Nines)
Maccent: mucks hand
GutshotJimmy collected $26 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $27 | Rake $1
Board [8d 7h 5d 4c 9h]
Seat 4: Maccent (big blind) mucked [As Kd]
Seat 9: GutshotJimmy showed [Ks 9c] and won ($26) with a pair of NinesMaccent said, “congrats.”
Ahhhh, note the bitter resignation and defeat in his voice in the end. At least I heard it that way. Is it wrong for his pain to make me so gleeful? One more disclaimer, I don’t always play like a total donkey, but I do get aggressive and make odd random plays once in a while.
